Post #97 The Cost of Remaining Comfortable
On one hand, you envy groups of people who hang out and form connections with one another. On the other hand, your attempts to make friends or be social quickly fade as the feeling of nausea settles in. Did you realize you are not the only student who is scared to talk to people?
Peers
You may prefer to communicate with your friends via social media. There is a shroud of secrecy when people engage with each other in the digital world (this comes from a person who lived a life without social media). One aspect of physical communication, body language, is completely void inside the social media mechanism. The second aspect of physical communication, tone of voice, is completely void. Sure, emojis can try to fill in for what’s lost in face-to-face communication, but they don’t do justice. When you are scared to talk to people, the digital space seems like a safe space to avoid vulnerability. I challenge you to ask yourself, “Why am I afraid to engage face-to-face?”
Professors and Other Adults
No doubt, people who seem much older can be intimidating. Most likely, they are not trying to intimidate on purpose. However, you never know the intention of someone else and your brain likes to assume the worst. When your brain assumes the worst, it is trying to protect you from danger – it is doing its job. Your job is to discern between real and fake danger. Even if you decide an adult is intimidating on purpose – what is the harm in trying to talk? The worst that can happen is not as bad as your brain leads you to believe. Challenge yourself to approach and talk to one new adult about anything. I promise, it only gets easier after that. When this challenge results in success, the reward is much more meaningful than any negatives due to potential failure.
The Value of Risk
You will forever be challenged with taking risks. It does not matter your major, your career, your social life, etc. Life will inherently bring about risk. You may tend to shy away from risk, as the idea of stability and comfort sounds more appealing. After all, what if you take a risk and fail (See Post #67). There is much value built into taking worthy risks. Best case scenario, everything works in your favor and life is much more enhanced. Worst case scenario, you start something over. You fail, learn, try again and gain knowledge. Knowledge is information and information is power. You must take risks if you ever want to emotionally grow, mature and evolve into the person you were meant to be.
For additional tools and brain exercises to help you manage your COVID-19 circumstances, visit my YouTube video: Managing Student Life During COVID-19.
